life as a pokemon trainer
by blobking156
Summary: after I get my first pokemon, things go downhill. I deal with an awsome mudkip, derp rival,and more to come! please read, I wat to be known
1. Chapter 1

**PROLOGUE**

_A new day. _

A/N ok, this is the first chapter of the first region in the first story of the Life of a _ series. This has A LOT of pedestal references, so GO READ IT. Kthxbye.

Key:

Regular- self explanatory

_Italic_- emphasis

Underline- Pokedex

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Pokémon, iPods, Katamari Damacy, dragon ball Z, or anything else I reference. I do own a dog named Harry, though

Like most every ten-year-old boy starting their Pokémon journey, I was ecstatic about what I was going to get as a starter. It could be an Electivire, a Camerupt, or maybe even a Charizard! But when my birthday had come, all I got was our family's (former) pet Mudkip. We had just moved to Sinnoh a few weeks ago, after being in Hoenn for years. Other than a Pokémon, I got _only_ a pokedex.

After my parents had almost literally kicked me out on my journey, I had no choice but to go right then. Probably only five seconds afterwards I tripped over my friend Kyle, who was sleeping on my front porch. "What the heck, man?" I practically yelled at him, bloody nose bleeding everywhere. "Why were you sleeping there?" Then I realized he had dropped his Starly. This made me remember to look to see if Kippy, my Mudkip, was okay too.

We ended up battling each other, standard first Pokémon battle. I ended up losing, mostly by trying to lower his Starly's stats. I lost half of my 10 thousand pokedollars (IT'S OVER NINE THOUSAND) I was given by my parents. Great, now I could only stay at the Pokémon center 500 times (not to mention food and item costs). "Why aren't you talking, you're usually the loudest single thing in Sunnyshore! Not to mention the gym leader's music that's constantly playing." I said. He then said hoarsely, "Swallowed a Trapinch. Hurts to talk." Oh it was just a-"WHAT? THEY'RE ALMOST AS BIG AS KIPPY! OR EVEN YOUR STARLY!" I punched him and, sure enough, a disgruntled Trapinch came out. "Trap. Tra pinch" it growled. "Dammit, I wanna translator now." I murmured." Then-oh noes- he pulled out his IPod. He turned it on and- "NA, NANANANANA NA NANUH KATAMARI DAMACY" oh my Arceus not more of this shit. I just _had_ to save him.

I grabbed his IPod an changed the song. "L TO THE I TO THE N TO THE K-" click.

"TAKE A DUMP IN THE TOILET-" click. -" click. I was fed up, so I yanked his IPod (nano, G3) and Kippy squirted it. "what. The *Starly*." Kyle said "STFU" I said.


	2. Chapter 2

**CHAPTER 1**

An (un-self induced) acid trip

A/N I am only doing _1_ disclaimer 'cause I'm lazy. Anyways, second chapter! Yay! I totally want pokepark 2! Ima go to sleep now and write in the morning

The next day, I woke up in the middle of a beach on a weird island. "what happened an WHERE IS MY BACKPACK!" then I saw some mushrooms. I was kinda hungry, so I ate one. BIG mistake. First I got tired, and when I woke up again, I was on afloat thingy. _INCEPTION! We have to go deeper_. ** I'm afraid we cant let you do that, starfox.** _Damn, the voices, they tells me to RUN! _**No we don't.**_ oh noes the voices read my thoughts_. **We **_**are**_** your thoughts. You're in your mind, after you ate those mind shrooms.**_ Mind shrooms? How do I know I'm not trippin'- _ **you are. Let me put on a more, ah, tangible form.** Then a black, mirror version of me appeared _ THE DARKNESS WITHIN! _** How'd you know! **_ You just told me._** DAMMIT.** He then stabbed me with a dark master sword ( think of demise's) and I blacked out. I woke up (again!) on a beach(AGAIN!) this time on Sunnyshore, with nurse joy by me. Not to mention another guy. "hey, I'm Gavin." He said. Hmm weird name. "Brian" I said weakly. I passed out (AGAIN!) I woke up in the pokemon center with kippy by my side. "where'd you find my bag!" I said, loud as I could ( which wasn't very loud) "oh, it washed up shortly after you fainted" said nurse joy. "Gavin found it." 'Where is he?" I asked. As if on cue, gavin came in, his pokemon in hands.

A/N that's it! R&R. (A/N backwards is N/A!)


	3. Chapter 3

A/N What's happenin' peeps, welcome back to the world of Pokémon. Tell me, are you a boy, or a girl. No, I'm just kidding I'm not oak. We'll see just what that Pokémon in Gavin's hands is.

"oh hello Gavin, chap, do you know the date?" I asked "Why, of course my dear fellow! Monday April 23, 3012, I do believe." He responded. His Pokémon(which I couldn't see because I was half asleep) jumped on me. It felt and smelled exactly like a gible, but I thought it was a watermelon. so, of course, I bit into it, making my teeth fall out "youw watahmewonth awe vewy hawd" I talked my very best. He facepalmed "that's my gible, gible, idiot"

"wow very original."

"thanks"

"/sarcasm"

"wha"

"nothing"


	4. Chapter in whitch many things are tmed

**CHAPTER 4**

_The plot continues_

A/N I am doing longer chapters now! Long_er_, still not long. just so you know, italics are Pokémon talking.

(-0-)(-0-)(-0-)

I decided to go find something to make the plot go faster, or at all. I was looking for a book on the gym circuit when I realized the start of this chapter did not match the end of the last. "Kippy, aren't the readers going to get confused by the author's inconsistency?!" I said. Kippy looked at me, unable to grasp what I meant, since I am the author technically. So I teleported with the power of the reset button which made a certain Diglett named Ressetti with a very big mouth (even though it didn't have a mouth)angry. That's a run-on sentence, isn't it. Well, I went back to beating up Kyle, when a Dratini with sunglasses came and started singing his name in the tune of Dragonite. " dra dra Dratini, dra druh Dratini, dra dra Dratini, Dratini tini" it sang. "Again, I want a translator." I mumbled loudly while still punching Kyle in the nose. It was bleeding by now. "You thould hafe anuff by now." Kyle said, speech impaired temporarily. "You're right!" I exclaimed. The Dratini held its tail out for me, like for a fist bump. I bumped it and he pointed towards my Ball Pokket (TM) on my Trainer Bag (TM) backpack with his tail. I had bought only one Pokeball, and I used it on him. "You shall be…. Tao!" I said, releasing Tao again. " let's get that translator!". When we got to the Pokemart, I walked in and it was deserted except for a guy behind the counter. "I demand a translator!" I said to the clerk. "Okay, our worst one is 99999999999999999.99999999999999999999 pokedollars" he replied. I looked in awe. "But our best is free!" the clerk added. "I dunno how that works but I'll take it!" I said. He handed me a box with a picture of a collar on it. It was apparently a trainer six pack. I opened it and put one on Tao, and one on Kippy. The instructions said it: "is water, fire, acid and, cold proof. It also comes with a remote that can turn it off or change languages." _This is really weird; I've never had a collar before. _ Said Kippy. "Yeah it is weird seeing you with it" I replied. _ Holy*_Mudkip* _trainer can understand me?!_ Apparently it had a censor too. _ Hey maybe this collar is an autotune! _Said tao I took out the remote, and sure enough, there was autotune. I turned it on for Tao. Meanwhile, outside, Kyle's nosebleed had stopped he had come to get his IPod shovel repaired, but the door to the Pokemart only opened to people with money. So he took a nap.

**END OF CHAPTAH**

A/N yay progress. Sort of. Kind of. Not really


End file.
